The Price of Silence

Last week, I wrote about the distinctions between silence, violence and peace. As a child, I recall hearing phrases such as “children should be seen and not heard,” and “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”  

To some, a child’s silence might represent a sign of respect, and not speaking about the not nice things allows some temporary comfort and ease. 

Who is your silence protecting or keeping comfortable?  

What is the price? Avoiding issues that matter, and not addressing your own needs or someone else’s, often creates further discontent.  

Teaching children or encouraging anyone to keep quiet about their experiences may lead to bigger issues later in life. 

I coach professionals from time to time who might feel very comfortable respecting their own needs and boundaries in some situations, and not others. One may be very competent at speaking up for themselves at work, and then quickly say, “yes” to things that interfere with their own needs for rest, health, joy etc. in their personal lives.  

I also work with professionals who set clear boundaries with loved ones, and do not express themselves very clearly within their organizations.  

You get to talk about your experiences in life, and particularly what you need. It does not mean that the people around you are necessarily responsible for meeting your wishes. You simply may express your needs, and ask for what you want.  

The price of silence is not necessarily knowing or understanding someone else’s needs, or someone guessing about how to meet yours. Being clear, although it might feel uncomfortable temporarily, usually makes life easier in the long-run.

If you need help sharing your truth or creating healthy parameters at home or work, you may get help through coaching or mediation.  

There may be a time and place for silence. There may also be a price.  

What does silence cost you? 

Sherry Ann Bruckner

Sherry Ann Bruckner

Most widely known as Lonzo's human, mediator, speaker, and author Sherry Ann Bruckner works with leaders and organizations to create peace, resolve conflict, and transform visions into results.

From her twenty-plus years' experience practicing civil and family law, and her own personal experiences with silence and violence, Sherry Ann understands how much inner peace impacts outer peace. A graduate of Hamline University's College of Liberal Arts and William Mitchell College of Law, she also studied conflict resolution at Rothberg International School in Jerusalem. Sherry serves as a neutral on matters ranging from bias and employment discrimination to marriage dissolution and caring for aging parents. A speaker and trainer on the global stage, Sherry gives you and your audience practical skills and the confidence to use embrace your personal power to create peace. Through helping thousands of people navigate their way through conflict, and finding her own way to inner peace, she shares the transformational power of clarity, compassion, curiosity, and cribbage.

Visit to learn more or give her a call at (320) 808-3212.
Sherry Ann Bruckner

Be gentle with you. Be gentle with all. Be the peace.